Cat Saves Dog: News at 11:00

I am hesitant to call the cat that lives with me a hero. “Hero” is a term that has been tossed around way too much this century; it seems that anyone who puts on a uniform of any kind is automatically bequeathed the honorific these days, deservedly or not. The feline that roams my house and backyard is indeed a fine animal, but she is also a serial killer of lizards, birds, and other small creatures that come across her path. She may be a Heroine or a Horror, depending on the illusions of the one doing the observing, but last night I observed her performing rather nicely as a puppy rescuer.
A little after 11:00 last night, I took the dogs outside for their pre-slumber evacuations. Pathetic Bob, Judy, Lily and Sophie circled the deck around the pool in search of he perfect spot pee. Bob and Sophie, unable to find suitable pee spots, wandered down stairs and widened their search into the surrounding gardens. I relaxed in an Adirondack chair, smoking a cigarette, while the dogs leisurely preformed their nightly business. Cat came by, and Lily, the little dog, pounced on her for their nightly wrestling match. Cat lets Lily win a few rounds, and then soundly kicks her tiny little ass. It was a good night in River City.
When the last of the carcinogenic smoke passed my lips, I stood up and called for everyone to reassemble in the house. Bob, Judy, Lily and Cat filed in the patio door, but Sophie was AWOL. After several stern calls from me, Sophie had still not returned so I began a search. It didn’t take long for me to hear Sophie’s trademark whine emanating from beneath the deck between the house and the pool. Although I had put up basket-weave fencing around the bottom of the deck to prevent canine ingress, over the years, it has yielded in places (especially behind the ivy), and the curious animals occasionally crawl under the deck in pursuit of whatever they happen to be pursuing.
After locating Sophie, I located the place she entered the under-deck and tried to call her over. It didn’t work. I got a flashlight and shined it through the spaces in the boards, hoping to guide her to the exit. She didn’t follow. Thirty minutes of coaxing later, it was apparent she was not going to follow me, so I had to move a very large pot and pull up a 16-foot, 2x6 deck plank. I could see Sophie, but she would not come to the opening. Picking up the crowbar, I tore up another plank. More whining, but no Sophie. Finally, she showed her cute little head, but when I tried to grab her and lift her out, she scampered away. “Goddamnit Sophie,” I said in the nicest possible way, “I’m not going to tear up the whole deck to get you out.” Sophie just whined.
About this time, Cat came strolling over and looked down into the opening. She then looked at me as if to say, “What’s the problem?” and jumped down under the deck. As I was getting ready to pull up yet another board in hopes of retrieving both the dog and Cat, Sophie came bounding up the stairs on the other side of the deck and ran inside. Cat came over to me and said, “Why didn’t you call on me first, that dog will follow me anywhere. Have fun rebuilding the deck, I’m going to bed.”